Interesting Facts

I got these facts in an email from Derek's aunt recently and thought they were so neat-I had to share!

The human body is a machine that is full of wonder. This collection of human body facts will leave you wondering why in the heck we were designed the way we were.
-Scientists say the higher your I. Q., the more you dream. (obviously I dream every night)

-The largest cell in the human body is the female egg and the smallest is the male sperm.

-You use 200 muscles to take one step. (why are my legs so scrawny looking then?)

-The average woman is 5 inches shorter than the average man. (I could have told you that much- how about over a foot shorter...)

-Your big toes have two bones each while the rest have three. (my toes are so fat, I didnt think they had bones)

-A pair of human feet contains 250,000 sweat glands. (GROSS)

-A full bladder is roughly the size of a soft ball.

-The acid in your stomach is strong enough to dissolve razor blades. (is that why reflux hurts so stinking bad?)

-The human brain cell can hold 5 times as much information as the Encyclopedia Britannica.

-It takes the food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.

-The average human dream lasts 2-3 seconds.

-Men without hair on their chests are more likely to get cirrhosis of the liver than men with hair.

-At the moment of conception, you spent about half an hour as a single cell.

-There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet. (GROSS again)

-Your body gives off enough heat in 30 minutes to bring half a gallon of water to a boil. (how can this translate to be used on Survivor?)

-The enamel in your teeth is the hardest substance in your body.

-Your teeth start growing 6 months before you are born. (I guess this explains people that look like they stole dentures from a rabbit?)

-When you are looking at someone you love, your pupils dilate, and they do the same when you are looking at someone you hate.

NEWSFLASH

I have been so hesitant to blog about the changes in my life. Its been up and down and all over the place, but a few months after I started my great quest- I finally got an offer for a fantastic job! Im so glad to be off the roller coaster and finally have a concrete idea of where my future may take me and know that I worked very hard to get there.

I didnt blog much about it for obvious reasons but as of this morning I am officially in my last two weeks at the American Cancer Society. Telling my supervisor, my team and the original group of peers I started with was a little bittersweet. I could tell they all understood how great my offer was and they knew that money was starting to become an issue for me, as was juggling two jobs with a boyfriend, a dog, a life and way too many bills.

I will be sad to leave my friends here- of course I loved the benefits, the vacation and the flexibility with my schedule but it is time to move on. When I started on March 19, 2007, I was in a class with 12 others. Of the 13 total that made up "Class 66", there are 4 that remain... one of those is myself. So as you can see, its not completely shocking that my time has come as 9 members of our class have already left us.

I will start my new job at Brown Distributing on September 29th and will be aiming my career back toward the sales path. I think it is a smart move for me as I seemed to have done so well with it while I was at RenewData and sold things I barely understood. Now, I will be selling and maintaining the bulk orders of beer. Beer I understand. My clients will consist of smaller restaurants, some coffee shops, bars and a country club or two. Here is hoping its as much fun as I am imagining it will be!

11 days later

I survived my wisdom tooth extraction. I am now a little less wise and very very rested. I had a full 5 days off of work to recover- most of which I spent asleep or glued to the tv watching old seasons of One Tree Hill on dvds I rented from Blockbuster. I know... Im a little less of a woman for admitting to that. Such a dramatic and riveting show, though.

Sorry to have left you deserted for such an unforgivable amount of time, please forgive me.

Be Careful What You Wish For

As far back as I can remember, I was told that I had no wisdom teeth whatsoever. None in, none coming in, none even close to inside my mouth. It became a running joke with the dentist I have seen since I was 8 that I simply "dont have any wisdom"- poor me, eh? I missed out on braces and retainers and now I would be one of very few who didnt get a week off to have my teeth yanked out.



I know what youre thinking, who on earth would WANT oral surgery? Well, I did. When I was younger, covered under my parents insurance and on someone elses dime, of course. Well Im here to tell you that never wish for something you dont REALLY want. All of a sudden, at age 25, I have a wisdom tooth that needs to be extracted, Im on my own insurance and its going to HURT!!!

I was informed last week that I would need to get it out as soon as possible. I made an appointment with the oral surgeon and will be having the extraction tomorrow. I suppose the up-side to having your gums sliced open and a tooth ripped from your jaw is the 5 day break that follows. I see many movies, much sleeping and lots of milkshakes in my near future.

Please feel free to call me, send me emails, text messages, carrier pigeons with jokes or just plain stop by! Im thinking that Ill be pretty bored by the end of day 2... at least Derek has agreed to be my own personal nurse and I can soak up his cable tv for the time being! Its all about the silver lining...

I Am Emotional, I Admit It

I found this on Stephanie Klein's blog this morning and I must be tired, or stressed or on the verge of some kind of meltdown because it brought me to tears:

She's the kind of girl who thinks she's good at cards, and she'll do a little dance when she wins. You'd tell her you only let her win so you could watch her, but she really did beat you. Truth is, you'd love her either way because really, you love the way she reacts to things. You love the way she cries at commercials and looks in her glasses, no makeup. And she thinks she looks ugly, but it's when you love her most...in her socks, comfortable at home, at her desk chair, caught picking her nose, but only a little. You love her like Sunday with eggs and the smell of bacon and fizzled onions. In her undershirt, her laugh, the way when she reads something she likes, she has to read it to you aloud. "Are you listening? You're not fucking listening. Pay attention. There will be a test." You like her threats and her smile, but you think she's prettier when she doesn't. When she thinks no one's watching her. You like her off. You can't stand how long it takes her to get ready or how many times she asks you to get her water, or please do this for me, but you compromise because she rolls down the windows and makes you forget about the traffic. She'll paint her nails in the car and whine when she's cranky and when she can't sleep. You like that you know she’ll sip at her tea in a way you can hear, and that she chews on her shirt collar when she’s nervous. That she prefers mittens to gloves and wishes she had a fireplace only for the smell. You love the curve of her face and the cup of her smile, the way she breathes in the dark, and how she loves you. You’ll spend the rest of your life letting her know you’re the lucky one, that you adore her, even with the extra twelve pounds, and you’ll whisper it every night, even when she can’t hear you.You love how she gets excited when they’ve got her Ben & Jerry’s flavor in stock. She’ll spin around in front of the glass door and say, “Hells yeah.” And she’ll look up for a moment to make sure you see her, the way she does at the movies when something good happens. She always wants to share with you--you know, except when it comes to her fries. Her fries are hers, and your fries are hers. Money too, but mostly the fries. You love the way you know her, that you know how to make her feel at home no matter where she is. Sometimes it’s as easy as the Disney channel and the original Parent Trap. Other times it’s ordering in and a bedtime story she forces you to make up, and if it sounds vaguely like any movie she knows, she’ll call you out on that shit and make you start over. With something new. Because as long as you both find and make new, you can stay with everything that’s old and broken-in.

We should all be so lucky to be loved that much!

Im In The Dog House

For the first time in a very long time, Molly was in BIG trouble last night. Its been such a long time since she did anything that made me as mad as I was last night so I think it shocked her to be in so much trouble, but boy was she ever!

Having taken her to play with her boyfriend Rufus on Saturday night, she was in desperate need of a bath. Because I had so much going on over the long weekend, it had to wait until last night.

Molly is always great about her baths and cooperates with me right up until the end. Its a little known fact, though, that when she is dried off and out of the tub she runs laps until she looks like her legs might snap off her little furry body. Last night was no exception to this rule so I didnt think much of it.

After she was done running around, she went and laid down under my bed (my guess is that she was still a little cold) and I went about my business. When it came time to leave the apt and do some running around she would NOT come out from under the bed. She would be on one side just within reach and would see me coming and move right to the middle of the bed- just to where I couldnt reach her. I tolerated this game of cat and mouse for a while and then I just flat ran out of patience. She was doing this for so long that she was actually making me late!!!

I tried treats, ice, pretending Id left, you name it- I tried it. After much frustration and time spent trying to coax her out, I had to grab her by the leg. It was pretty sad and I know it scared her but she needed to get out. I gave her a spanking hoping she would know what shed done wrong and maybe "learn" that it wasnt okay with me but all it did was make her scared of me for the rest of the night. She didnt even want to come in from outside to go to bed, she would run when I got within five feet of her.

Am I a bad mom or does anyone else have this problem when disciplining their dog(s)?

For Derek

I know I just filled out a survey in my last blog so Ill switch this one up a bit. I have been a bit of a Grumpy Gus for a few days and the lucky person to experience the worst of it would have to be Derek. For that, I have decided, he needs some praise!

All the reasons I am oh so lucky to have him:

He has been tolerating me for 15 months. Thats a long time, my friends.

He is so sweet to Molly, he is always picking her up when I work late, taking her out for me, and he is much better at playing fetch with her than I am.

He loves his Aggies. And I love that.

He is very, very smart.

He allows me to be "sensitive" when I need to be. He also allows me to be a neat freak and it doesnt bother him one bit. This may be due to the fact that he knows I will clean a mess he has left behind, but that is neither here nor there.

He takes me to dinner a lot. A whole lot.

He has come to Boston with me and met some of the most important people in my life.

He makes killer enchiladas. One of only two meals I will eat as leftovers.

He is just as social as I am and knows how important friends are.

He is almost always first to say Im sorry.....Im working on that.

We had the most amazing first date ever. He even recreated it for our six month anniversary.

He comes with an amazing family and group of friends. I feel truly blessed to know "his people"

He throws an amazing party-pretty much for any reason.

He loves me just the way I am.

Getting to Know You...Getting to Know All About You

Here are some things about me you may not already know:

Never in my life have I been: to Australia

The person who can drive me nuts is: My mother-she is also the most supportive person I know, I just dont like to hear when she is right and I am wrong.

High school: Anderson

When I'm nervous: talk a lot... or not at all

The last song I listened to was: I listened to celeb news on the radio... my fave

If I were to get married right now my best man/maid of honor would be: It would be oh so hard to pick... thank goodness I dont have to right now

My hair is: dirty...surprising, I know

When I was 5: I lived in MA

Last Christmas: I spent lots of time with my own family, Dereks family and then we went to Boston- Excellent way to celebrate in my book

I should be: going to the gym daily- either that or start buying circus tents to wear

When I look down I see: picture frames on my desk

The happiest recent event to occur was: Everyday something happy happens to me, Im a lucky girl

If I were a character on 'Friends' I'd be: Dont know, Im the one person in all of America that doesnt like that show

By this time next year: I hope to have a better idea of my "career" plans

I have a hard time understanding: math- it may as well be Greek

There's this girl I know that: Ive known my WHOLE life- not many people can say that.
You know I like you when: I laugh at your dumb jokes

If I won an award, the first person I would tell would be: my Mom or my grandfather

Take my advice: trust your gut

The thing I want to buy: Id love a new car, but not having a car payment is pretty sweet

If you visited the place I was born: it would depress you, lol. MA is a little gloomy for my taste

I plan to visit: with my Grandmother when she is here in Sept. Best news Ive gotten all day!

I'd stop my wedding if: I wasnt sure if I was marrying the right person... but if I was unsure, I doubt I would have let it get that far

The world could do without: liars

Most recent thing I've bought myself: food- how exciting

Most recent thing someone else bought me: I would have to say food from Derek when we went to dinner or maybe my birthday gifts

My middle name is: Kara

In the morning I: snooze until the last possible moment

Once, at a bar: I fell off my stool and hit my chin on the way down- I wish I could blame it on the drinks Id had, but it was more my just being clumsy than anything else

Last night I was: at the movies! Pineapple Express... (hilarious)

There's this guy I know who: makes me laugh ALL the time, even when I want to be mad.

If I was an animal I'd be: a puppy- everyone loves puppies!

A better name for me would be: I like my name thank you, didnt used to, but Im used to being "different"- except when people call me Debra, Stephanie or Deadray- that last one is real. A man last week actually called me that- as if its actually a name at all. Sheesh!

Tomorrow I am: working from 1-9 so I can go to the dentist (finally)

Tonight I am: probably going to think of an excuse to skip the gym and eat food that will only make me feel worse. But The Hills is on so that will help.

My birthday is: over- it was August 3rd

Dirty Desiree

I look like trash today. Complete and total trash. Suffice it to say that I am wearing jeans, a Blue October t-shirt and my Rainbows. Nice. Its not that I dont care about the way I look or that I dont care about my job enough to put together a "real" outfit- its more about those glorious 45 extra minutes of sleep I get when I decide to look like this. Like I do today.

I am lucky to have a work environment that is based on comfort and is very lax in its guidelines. See, to me, I feel like I look like a homeless panhandler that one might encounter under the bridges of IH35, but to my coworkers, I probably seem right on par for work. Sure, some people here dress nicely and actually bother to apply make up on Fridays, but not me.

I have this admittedly strange school of thought that getting all gussied up for work on a Friday is just plain silly. Let me tell you why:

1) There is just no way that your hair will not look as good as it did this morning when its time to start your evening. Parts might be flatter than they started out, other parts may have flipped in the wrong direction. This is just unacceptable.

2) (for me) Its next to impossible to "freshen up" your face without feeling like you have dipped your entire head in cake batter. I know this is a strange comparison, but thats how I feel when I think I have too much make up on. Caked.

3) How can you possibly know what youll want to wear that night- and how is a work outfit also just the right choice for whatever you might be doing later? Sure, you could go home and change, but that seems like so much work.

I, myself, prefer to start fresh at the end of the day, ring in the weekend with fresh hair, make up and clothes. So, I have now let you into the deepest and darkest corners of my "getting dolled up" mind and now that you all think Im crazy/unsanitary/rough to look at, Ill leave you with a picture I took of myself this morning:

Happy Friday to you all!

I Am a Bad Blogger

I know, I know, its been far too long since my last post.

I dont really have an excuse either... just letting life get the best of me, I suppose.

I quit work at Massage Envy. Yes, a two and a half month stint was all it took. They werent getting what they wanted from me, and I wasnt getting what I wanted from them. Come pay day, it was nice to have an extra chunk of change but what I was being paid in comparison to what I was missing out on in my social circle just didnt add up. I am currently looking for a new second job and have decided to spare you all the details as last time it got so hairy and was hard for even me to keep up with.

I just ask that you guys keep me in your thoughts- its time for a change and Im doing everything I can to hurry it along.

Patriotism, Braces and Twins

I cannot, for the life of me, remember a time I was more interested in the Olympics than I have been this week. Granted, Michael Phelps (who some may argue is part dolphin) helps a lot, but the gymnastics and the swimming have absolutely blown me away. I have always enjoyed watching the Olympics- the figure skating, the gymnastics, the running, the skiing, etc. but it was more of a chance happening. If I turned the TV on, and I happened to catch an event, Id sit and watch for a bit. This year, however, I find myself actually studying my watch, counting down the minutes until the excitement from Beijing flicks onto my TV screen. 11:30 finds me up way past my bedtime, replacing the urge to sleep with a fast beating heart and clenched fists.

Now, I know everyone on earth is aware of Michael Phelps' amazing talent in the pool (aka "water cube") so going on and on about how wonderful a swimmer he is seems a bit unnecessary. Anyone that can rack up that many gold medals automatically gains hero status in my book! But I will allow myself to take this in a different direction... HIS TEETH! PLEASE, Michael, this is an open plea to get your teeth fixed. You are on the cover of every magazine known to man, your face has been beaming from every TV across the world and your teeth are horrid. I realize its a bit tacky to point it out, but were all friends here, no? Seriously. See an orthodontist and I'll leave you alone.

Lastly, in other Olympic news, I would like to show all of you that my friend Sarah has a twin. The irony not only stands out when I look at Sarah and then at Shawn Johnson and the resemblance is uncanny, but theres more. Shawn Johnson has proudly dawned 411 right there on her back for the world to see- that's Sarah's birthday! And of course, Sarah is a former gymnast. When I was younger, I used to tell my friends she would go to the Olympics someday... and I think I meant it, I mean, I knew she was good, but either way... I WAS RIGHT!

A side by side comparison that will in no way, shape, or form do the similarities justice:

I am loved

I feel like I should be sporting one of those buttons that reads "I am loved"- I think its the silly product of an over-priced jewelry store thats given out when you plunk down who knows how many dollars on Valentines Day. Either way, I should be wearing one today.

Thank you so much to everyone who came out on Saturday for my birthday party! I had such a good time and truly felt like the luckiest girl on earth! I got a one of a kind cake made just for me by Rhonda, tons of delicious food made by Derek's Mom, Janet-and of course all of the miles logged by some of my very best friends. I truly have had one of the best birthday weeks ever.

No Fair!

I throw my best fits on here so dont mind while I throw yet another one.

The Massage Envy I work in happens to be smack dab in the middle of a brand new and half empty shopping center. Next to the clinic, a Third Base Sports bar is being built. I have seen the progress since I started working next door and have been eagerly awaiting its opening as it seems like a fun place to meet friends when I get off work. I so often am too tired to drive anywhere to meet everyone, so the idea of walking over and sitting down for a cold one seemed nice. Provided I have time to change out of my band-aid colored polo of course...


While working last night, one of the new owners came in to get a massage. I met him and we talked a bit, he told me all about the bar and then proceeded to ask me if Id be coming over the next day (today) to enjoy "friends and family night" and eat and drink for free. Tara, the 19 year old assistant manager I was working with, piped in and quickly squashed my dreams of endless drinks flowing out onto someone else's tab and said "She will not be one of the sales associates we are bringing over. Its all upper management and people that have been working here longer"- BURN!

Sure, I havent been there long, and it makes sense to send the upper management, but I ask you, how much use can a 19 year old have in a BAR?! She is not even supposed to STEP FOOT in there!!! So, to her response, I didnt say much but told him that he could count on me being there once the doors were open to the public, and I suspect I may weasel my way into a free drink or two...

Ugh! Teenagers with a bossy attitude... Im so glad Im not one of those anymore!!

Geriatric

So... I have to poke fun at myself for a moment. For the most part, I am a pretty dramatic person and tend to blow things out of proportion (i.e. out of the water) but this time, I really did hurt myself.

I thought that falling down in the shower was something only really really old people experienced by alas, I am now one of those really really old people and so, it was my turn.



I stepped into the shower and planted my right foot in what I can only assume was the soapiest and slimiest part of my bath tub last night. No, its not dirty but for some reason, it felt a little soapy. Much to my dismay, my foot did not stop there and flew right out from under me. Now, because I was putting all of my weight on said right foot, my left one followed in its path and also came out from under me. I found myself straddling the tub- my poor tailbone breaking my fall. As if that didnt hurt enough, my left leg slammed into the side of the tub and I know have a lump the size of a silver dollar and two deep purple bruises in either side of it.


Maybe I should have asked for a shower chair for my birthday instead of the beautiful diamond ring Derek gave me.

Do I make this look good, or what?

Birthday Love

Thank you so very much to everyone who made my birthday extra special this year. Turning 25 was rough for me, but all my friends and family made it so much fun!

My birthday weekend got off to a great start when I got to leave work super early on Friday. I went home and did some un-fun chores and checked in on Molly then rounded up some friends for a nearby happy hour. After that, Derek and I went to see Step-Brother, which was pretty funny.

On Saturday morning, I got to watch Macey for a little while- and she is so much fun might I add. We played with toys, watched the dogs run around in the back yard, and of course I chased her all over the house as she is much more mobile these days. She really put me to work! After a little quality time with Ryan and Rhonda after they came home, I headed to my own home to get ready for Kelsey's wedding. The cool thing about doing stuff with Derek's family is that they all feel like friends. Ryan and Rhonda, though they are Derek's brother and sister-in-law, are so much fun and it feels like Im hanging out with some of my very own best friends. Because I dont have siblings of my own, I think I seriously underestimate how good of friends they can be too! Also, as if theyre not enough, we get to hang out with Kelby and Riley (Derek's cousins) and Karin, who is Kelby's girlfriend is my FIFTH COUSIN! How funny is that?!

The wedding was a lot of fun, good food, good company and good music- what more could we ask for? Nothing. It was perfect.

I woke up on Sunday and immediately felt old. Maybe it was the late night I had the night before, or maybe it was mental but I perked up right away when the well wishes started to roll in. Its so nice to feel so loved on your special day and I felt nothing short of loved all day long. Being Texas and summer, the most logical use of the day was spending it at a pool with any and everyone who wanted to come and celebrate. We had a lot of fun in the pool and wore ourselves out just in time to eat dinner at Tokyo Steak House. Sunburn free and appetites roaring, we ate until we thought we might burst.

So... thank you all to came out, thank you for the phone calls, the text messages, the facebook and MySpace messages, the cakes (Steph and Katie), and the cards. It felt so incredible to be so loved yesterday and I could not have asked for a better way to spend my birthday!